The Existential Diatribe

Author: nowwhat974

  • Guidepost

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    “The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians: who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, walk out the door, and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.” — Brennan Manning I am not a Christian; however, I was raised by one to be one. I’m…

  • More Dangerous Than a Gun

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    The Matrix is one of my favorite movies, and I’m not entirely convinced that we don’t live in a simulation—though not quite the one the movie depicts. As much as I love that film, the premise is technically implausible for reasons I won’t get into today, mainly because humans consume more energy than we produce.…

  • Gone

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    It’s always sudden in the end. They are here, then they’re gone. It doesn’t matter why, because it always boils down to “gone.” I don’t know what happens after death. No one does, despite what they may tell you. If their faith helps them sleep at night, then far be it from me to argue…

  • Not a Cult!

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    I’m thinking about starting a commune. It’s mainly for financial reasons—nothing too “cultish.” I mean, you will have to call me “His Holiness,” but not because I’m morally pure; it’s just because my clothes have holes in them and I can’t afford new ones in this economy. There will be a “Donation Plate,” of course.…

  • Grace

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    It’s not dignified; it’s embarrassing, if I’m being honest—this business of growing old. It is one of the many reasons they say, “Growing old is not for the weak.” So, how do we do it with grace, and who is this measure of grace for? When I was ten, maybe eleven, I came home one…

  • The Stories We Tell

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    We tell stories. We tell stories about what happened at the grocery store. We tell stories about our kids, our parents, and our childhoods. We tell stories about wars and gods and creation; we tell stories to pass the time, to make a connection, and to try to find reason in the chaos. Everything we…

  • This Present Darkness

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    There is a deep and unshakable sadness in me. It’s there even though I’m happy, it’s there even though I’m in love. It’s there when I’m peaceful and awake and it visits me in my dreams. It’s warm like a blanket, the cloak of loss that hides me from you and you from me. It’s…

  • Home

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    What is a home? I suspect that the answer is different for different people. For me, it’s the house we are selling. I grew up here but didn’t move here until I was 37. My first night in this house was the most alone I’ve ever felt. I was about to finalize a divorce; I…

  • Unpopular Opinion

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    Unpopular opinion, but it’s one I’m adamant about. Children are not the priority in a family, your spouse/partner is. Don’t misunderstand me, it’s a photo-finish race most days, and those lines are blurred as they should be. I have four children, two from a previous marriage and two younger ones from my current marriage. I’m…

  • Gratitude

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    This life is better than I deserved. I’m not sure any of us deserve anything, really; we just have at it. It’s the “having at it” that I actively avoided for a long time. I don’t talk about it often, and I’m not sure why I would, but my life has had more than its…